Sorry, Sorry, Sorry

I am sorry I haven't posted in a while. I haven't forgotten about my bloglife.

It's just that, you see, my sister is getting married this weekend and I have been busy with stuff relating to this. Mostly cleaning my house and preparing for visitors(mental and physical stuff). Some of this stuff I had put off for way to long. Oh! And everyone from my Dad's side of the family(except for my Dad, because he wasn't invited) is coming to the wedding. This weekend should be quite the ride. Hopefully, I can hold on tight, keep my emotions in check, my mouth shut and enjoy the ride.

Sling Shot

The following happened with an 8 year old at work today-

After he was overheard telling another child that he could see her underwear and I shook my head at him, to let him know that he shouldn't be saying this. He says to me, rather loudly, from across the room, "What? At home when my mom bends over and we see her underwear, we tell her that we can see her sling shot!"

I'm guessing she doesn't wear briefs.

Interesting Facts I Learned Today

My bible study group finished our last study and we decided to do a study on Jonah. I never knew what an awful place Ninevah was. If God told me to go to Ninevah, I think, I would have headed somewhere else just like Jonah. I would like to say that I would do whatever God told me to do and go wherever God told me to go, but I am not so sure that I would. I struggle to do the small things God asks me to do and they are a cake walk compared to what he asked of Jonah. I might be the only one who didn't already know these things. Either way, I hope you find these interesting.

Here are a few facts about Ninevah(from around the time God told Jonah to visit):

1. They were pagan people that hated Jews.(Jonah was a Jew)
2. They would go to Jewish settlements and kill everybody and make a pyramid out of the heads they had collected.
3. They were like our modern day version of a War Lord.
4. They would take people out to the desert, bury them up to their chin, pull out their tongue, put a stake in it and leave them to die.
5. It was about 200 miles away from where Baghdad is today.(I guess things haven't changed much through out the years.)

"I'm Feelin' Hella Good, So I Just Keep On ........

Farting, I'm feelin' hella good, so I just keep on farting." Yes, this is my son's new version to the No Doubt song Hella Good. It normally goes "I'm feelin' hella good, so I just keep on dancing." Apparently his version is best sung while wagging your butt from side to side. I'm unsure who to thank for the creativity being shown by my son. I do believe that Grandpa, Uncle Troy, and Dad are at the top of the list and probably grinning from ear to ear with pride as they read this. I, however, think it is kind of funny, but am upset that he picked a No doubt song to desecrate because this is my favorite band. And, of course, he picked the song that says "hella" in it. That way I get to document in my blog that my music that was listened to, with my son in the van is what caused him to cuss for the first time. Of course, he has no clue what he is saying and at the time was trying to irritate his sister. I guess my play list just got cut! That sucks! I love that CD and I'm tired of listening to Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, among others.

Konrad, also, told me on Saturday that he knows what ta-tas, tees, and breasts are. I was ready to rip into Kurt, since he had been hanging around with him all day.
So, I asked "Oh, you do?"
and he says, while clapping, "Yeah, ta-ta, ta-ta, tee and rest."(sounds like breast)
Then I figured out what my sister-in-law the music teacher, probably, figured out right away. These are beats that he is learning in music class and he claps twice for ta-ta, once for tee, and does nothing during the rest. Boy, was I relieved.

I think we just lost our bid for Parents of the Year. I guess we had it coming! Atleast, we didn't let him play in the middle of the street with a sharp knife. We should get points fo that.

A Shower Success Story

This weekend I threw a bridal shower for my sister. It went incredibly well and, I think, everyone had a good time. If they didn't then they are a bunch of good actors and liars. I am way excited about this because I did something different for her shower. Atleast, I've never heard of it being done. Instead of playing the usual assortment of games that you play at every shower, we beaded. Of course, I liked the idea and thought it sounded like fun. I was a bit nervous that no one would enjoy it or they would be intimidated by it. I put an assortment of glass beads all over the table in containers and gave everyone 4 loops of memory wire with one end turned and let everyone get to work. Everyone's bracelet looked different and except for one(the two flowergirl's looked better than hers) they all turned out cute and definitly wearable. I, also, brought stuff to make earrings and the people who got done before some of the others were able to make matching earrings. We then did cake and gifts and the shower was over in about 1 1/2 hours. I thought the timing was perfect. I just love it when everything works out the way you envision it. Thanks God! It worked out so well that I volunteered to do a baby shower for my pregnant sister-in-law who enjoys beading and got me started. Oh! and by the way, I also volunteered that my other sister-in-law would help me with the shower. She reads this and is now aware that she has been volunteered. Don't worry I left room for you to bow out gracefully if you need to. That's what you get for calling me a hippie, even if I secretly embrace this title. LOL!

Here's a picture of my bracelet-

Best Brother is Home

Yep, that is right. He arrived home last night. We are all glad to hear he is home, especially his wife. When he got off of the plane in Maine(I think? before flying to California) there was a group of Veteran's there to cheer for them and welcome them home. He thought this was pretty cool.

I was, also, informed recently by Kirsten that Piles is a very special bear and he has two birthdays. To bad he ended up in our family because we only celebrate one birthday per person per year. This is strict family policy. Good try on her part, though!

Piles Birthday Party

While doing some shopping for my sister's bridal shower that I'm helping to throw this weekend. Kirsten informs me that today is Piles birthday. For those of you who don't know, Piles is her favorite and very special stuffed animal and unless she can find a replacement for his tickle nose she has trouble falling to sleep or calming down. Piles has been a part of our family for more than 6 years and he also has the distinction of being Kirsten's only male stuffed animal. Now, Piles has never had a birthday before and I didn't know that koala bears (that look like a regular bears that resemble what James Frey(author of A Million Little Pieces) claims he looked like when he arrived at the clinic) even had birthday's.

Needless to say, that when I found out that it was Piles birthday I was a bit suprised and the following conversation took place.

"Oh, I didn't know it was Piles birthday."
"Well, it is. What is today?"
"Thursday"
"No, I mean what is the day, day?"
"It is the 9th?"
"Yeah, that's right his birthday is on today the ninth and he needs a party! And I will invite all my friends and Piles would like that. Piles would like that(pointing at something) for his birthday and he would like that, and......I tune out....... yada yada yada................ yada yada yada....... yada yada yada...........he's five just like me."

I must of had a weak moment. I think part of it was realizing that she's going to school next year and I'm not sure how much longer she will have this wonderful imagination. So, I gave in and let her pick out a gift from the $1.00 section to give Piles. I, also, let her pick out some cupcakes with Carebear rings on them. I did draw the line at inviting friends, but by the time we left the store she had worked in a package of balloons and Madagascar napkins. And it was all worth it!!

When we got home, she immediatly started drawing and coloring a picture to wrap his gift in and she wrapped his gift herself. Piles ate dinner with us, balloons were blown up in his honor, we ate cupcakes on the Madagascar napkins, and Kirsten helped Piles open his gift. She held his paw in her hand while she used the same hand to unwrap the gift. Yes, it was a good party and everyone except Konrad enjoyed themselves. Konrad proclaimed it the most boring birthday party ever. Even if Konrad didn't have a good time, I know Kurt and I will cherish this memory.

And in truly cheesy fashion-

Present for Piles $1.00
Carebear Cupcakes $2.50
Package of Ballons $ .95
Napkins $1.25
Being invited to my daughters stuffed koala's 5th birthday party $Priceless$

YAY!!! Best Brother Made My Day!!!

I was checking the comments on my last two posts and I had comments from someone new. At first, I was a bit curious about who this wierdo was that was reading my blog. Imagine my suprise and excitement when I found out that I know the weirdo. It was my brother who has been in Iraq for the last 6 months. Hopefully, I will get to talk to him over the phone when he is home safe and states-side in the next week. I enjoyed hearing from him in my comments section. Just for the record, he is my best brother. Of course, the odds are in his favor as he is my only brother.

Hey B, thanks for taking the time to comment. I know you don't always have a lot of time, and you made my day. That and the fact that you pointed out that I look better in make-up and younger than Carrot Top. Also, A BIG THANKS for not using you usual screen name of "scalded nut" I am sure nobody had taken that one, yet. he..he..he..LOL - I Am looking to hearing form you soon. Love ya!

Grand Prix Results

The Saturday before we left on our trip, we had the Grand Prix. Yes, I did get the cars done and they turned out pretty good. Atleast, I thought so. Neither one of them was fast enough to win the race(Kurt was in charge of the wheels and weights-That's what makes the car fast. So we'll blame it on him) I was in charge of design. And Drumroll, Please..... Konrad's won 1st place for design. He told me what he wanted, I helped him draw it out, he sanded it and primed it, and I helped him paint it. I don't think it hurt him any that some of his highschool buddies(like the scoob and Lyle) were the judges. Kirsten didn't win anything. I think this is partly because the powers that be thought I did everything on her car(mainly adults whose children don't have the imagination or ideas that Kirsten does, and therefore they don't understand how involved she truly was). I did most of the work on her car, as did the other parents of 5 year olds. But she decided what she wanted it to look like, what color, and where to glue the rhinestones. She also helped with the sanding and supervised the painting. As she was telling me for the 10th time in a very assertive manner that she wanted her car color to be violet. It occured to me that there is only one letter difference between violet and violent and I was starting to do deep breathing exercises so as not to add the "n" to the equation. Anyhow, there were a few tears shed because she didn't win a trophy. and the following conversation took place between Grandma and Kirsten.

G-"So how was the Grand Prix?"

K-"Not good, I didn't even win a trophy."(this was said in a very whiny voice.)
G-"Have you ever noticed that whenever we play Sorry or another game that there can only be one winner?"
K-"So, do you want to talk to Konrad?"

I guess she didn't want to talk about it. Konrad's car is a tank/hummer, it is his version of what Uncle Brad drives in Iraq. Kirsten's car is a giraffey violet colored car being driven by a giraffe queen. Kirsten has dressed her giraffe queen in a polka dot crown, violet and pearl necklace, along with a matching cape. I don't know, but it makes sense to her.

I've Returned From the Great Beyond

Kurt and I got back in town on Tuesday night. We had a great time and it was very relaxing. We enjoyed our adventure while throwing our money away at the penny slots and bingo. While in Vegas, we received coupons to see the Tournament of Kings(at Excalibur) at no charge. It's this jousting and sword fighting play and it was OK, but not worth the $55.00 dollars per person they charge. When we drove into Vegas we noticed Carrot Top was performing and we were able to get tickets at $40.00 per person, the show was 10X better than the Tournament of Kings and we didn't have to sit next to a gay couple. I had Kurt sit next to them because there was a women next to the other empty seat. They were nice guys and joked with them a little bit and I didn't realize they were gay until we were walking out of the show. Kurt said he figured it out pretty quick, He had his Gadar(gay radar) on. Whatever that means. Anyhow, Carrot Top was hillarious and we (especially Kurt) laughed the entire time. I bought a Carrot Top t-shirt and then Kurt and I had a discussion that I would like your input on. Here are the arguments and a picture of the graphic on the t-shirt.

Becky's Argument-
I like the t-shirt, mostly because I am a carrot top, myself. I have been called this name since at least 2nd grade, way before I had ever heard of the comedian Carrot Top. Shoot, he was probably still in middle school. I thought it was a pretty cool t-shirt for a red head to wear.

Kurt's Argument-
You know you can't wear that t-shirt to certain places and events, because everybody knows he does vulgar jokes.

So here is my question, if you see a red head wearing a Carrot Top t-shirt do you think of the comedian or the red head? Please let me know what you think!

My Wheels Are Spinning And I'm Not Moving

Sorry, I haven't posted in awhile. I am fighting sickness, finishing grand prix cars, sending out bridal shower invitations, getting an oil change, cleaning out the van, and attempting to finish my current real estate course. Of course I'm supposed to get all of this done today, because tomorrow morning is the grand prix and early Sunday morning Kurt and I are getting out of town for a few days to celebrate our anniversary.

I am so excited to be getting out of town for a couple days. It's hard to believe, but we've been married for 12 years. WOW!

I've Been Tagged

I was tagged by Sarah and I am kinda excited about it. I don't think I've been tagged before. At the same time I'm kinda nervous. You are about to find out what a boring person, I truly am. Well, here you have it....The exciting life of a Colorado Native.

4 Jobs you've had in your life:

1. Insurance Agent
2. Gift Wrapper
3. Soda Fountain Clerk
4. Candy Clerk (@Enstrom's)

4 Movies you watch over and over again:

(I don't really watch very many movies)

1. Any good sports movie(In all honesty, is doesn't really have to be very good at all.)
2. Anne of Green Gables
3. The Incredibles
4. Sorry, I'm out of answers

4 Places I have Lived:

1. I was born and raised in the town I currently live in.

4 Tv shows you love to watch:

1. American Idol
2. Amazing Race
3. CSI
4. Friends

4 Places you have been on vacation:

(I've never flown on an airplane)

1. Mexico, Tijuana
2. Yellowstone(Not recommended as the ideal family vacation for a teenager)
3. California
4. Mount Rushmore

4 Websites you visit daily:

1. Real Estate Training Center(I'm currently studying to get my real estate license)
2. Sarah's Sermons
3. Yahoo News
4. Singerzwife

4 Favorite foods:

1. Santorini Pizza(Nick and Willy's)
2. Mole Enchiladas
3. Good Chips and Good Salsa(Fiesta Guadalajara)
4. Chicken Enchilada Soup (Chili's)

4 Places you would rather be right now:

1. In a cabin on the mountains with my family, with no cell phone coverage, internet, or phone service.
2. At the beach
3. In Bed
4. At a spa-with a very expensive package already paid for.

4 People you tag to complete this:

1. Singerzwife
2. It's OK I'm with the Band
3. Knead the Dough
4. Bren>3 (You can use the comments section if you want.)

You Know It Is Going To Be An Interesting Day

When it is 9:00 am and you have already spanked your daughter twice, taken many deep breaths, counted to 5 atleast 10 times, rubbed her back 4 times(to calm her down), shown extreme mercy in the fact that she has only received two spankings, and prayed with her that God would take the bad ideas out of her head(This was her idea and she avoided a spanking with it). She is currently spending her second day cleaning her room, which means for everything we tell her to put away, she is getting out twice as many to play with. I'm guessing, that she will be spending tomorrow in her room as well. Unless, she decides to actually put her toys away. Don't worry Mom, I am not throwing her into her room and without giving her some direction. She is still working on picking her dress-up clothes from yesterday. And according to her it is not her fault, she can't get Sky High(We rented this movie for the kids to watch a month ago) or her bad ideas out of her brain. We can only guess as to what else is floating around in there.

? Giraffe Fairy Tale ?

As you can tell by the title, I will be talking about my daughter and her active imagination. I didn't even know you could put those three words together, let alone use them to describe something. Keep in mind, that along with her active imagination comes a very strong will that sometimes leads to plenty of discussing and explaining. Discussing and explaining things to a girl with an active imagination and strong will is like talking to a brick wall, that can discuss and explain things back to you. The only difference is that my discussing and explaining involves rational thoughts.

So, here's the story. On January 28th is our Awana Club's Grand Prix. The Grand Prix is race involving cars made from a block of wood(7"x 1 1/2" x 1 3/4") and the cars have to be made so as not to exceed cetrain dimensions(7" x 3" x 2 3/4") or weight (5 oz.). That being said you can, within those guidelines make your car look however you want. On the way home from Awana's last night I asked the kids what design they wanted their cars to look like. Kirsten pipes up right away, as is normal, and says she wants her car to look like a a giraffe fairy tale. Now, I'm not educated in princess, princess things, or anything involving pink. So, I ask, "What is a fairy tale?" I'm thinking, once I figure this out I'll be able to figure out how the giraffe fits in. She says, "You know Mom it is what princesses have." Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't princesses have a lot of things? Have you ever heard of any of them involving a giraffe? So I ask, "What do princesses do with a fairy tale?" She replies,"They ride in it to go the royal ball." Ah HA! She wants a carriage, but how does the giraffe fit in. I'm already thinking ahead to the height requirement that can't exceed 3 inches, giraffes have a tendency to be fairly tall. So I say, "The car can only be so tall and what about the giraffe?" She says,"Oh, I want the giraffe to ride in the fairy tale and I want her to be a ballerina princess. I want her to have a crown and wear a ballet thing and a cape." Seeing as we are almost home, it is bedtime, and most importantly I'm not ready for the discussing and explaining I see in my future. I tell her that she will have to draw a picture for me in the morning. So folks, Here you have it..... The Giraffe Fairy Tale.

After some discussing and explaining, she is still adamant that there be a giraffe pulling the fairy tale and that it be attached, either by string or by gluing its tail to it. Also, she will not even think about the possibility of being able to remove the giraffe and just racing the fairytale. As you can see I've got some more discussing and explaining in my future. Also, after some discussion it has been decided that it is called a fairy tale and not a carriage. What can I say, I'm saving my strength for future endeavors and she is very persuasive.

The Boys Are Out Of Town

So the boys left to go hunting this morning at 4:00 am. When I say boys I am including Konrad. Last time they went on one of these hunting trips Konrad came back very dirty and gross. He had helped them gut the elk(I guess that is what you call it?). This time he made sure to take his pocket knife that he received for Christmas so that he could be even more helpful than last time. Last night we packed his stuff and thanks to Christmas he was ready to go. He took his fanny pack with a water bottle, pocket knife, binoculars along with some snacks and orange vest to wear. He also brought along a tin of anchovies. That way if Uncle Troy or Uncle Cody wanted his snacks he would offer them the anchovies as a substitute to his dried apples. Kurt learned from last time and made sure to bring along some wipes to help clean him up. I sure hope those wipes are powerful along with some deodorizing powers.

So Kirsten and I are just hanging out and she is excited because she gets to eat a pepperoni pizza pocket for lunch. These have recently been added to the top of her list of things she will eat. Keep in mind, this is a very short list and we are always happy when we can add something to it. Lately, it has been a toss-up as to her favorite, it is between pizza Hot Pockets and ham and cheese sandwiches. It doesn't get more nutritious than that.

My Weekly Grounding and Pounding

Yesterday, I went to my weekly bible study. We are currently doing a study called "The Bait of Satan". It has been a great study and continually challenged me. Yesterday was no exception. One of the things we read was Psalm 35. As we were reading it I was thinking, "Yeah, that's how I have been feeling!" Now, I'm sure that when David wrote it he was probably facing more life and death situations than I am. After we were done reading it, the author and our leader pointed out Psalm 35:13-14. I was then convicted by that passage as well as a quote in the book. Even though I was praying for these people who have been offending me, I was not praying for them as I should. I wasn't praying for them as if they were close brothers or sisters that I truly love. I was not praying the very things for them that I want God to do for me. I guess you could say I was praying half-assed. So as usual, my weekly bible study was my weekly grounding and pounding experience.

Psalm 35:13-14 - But as for me, when they were sick, my clothing was sackcloth; I humbled myself with fasting; and my prayer would return to my own heart. I paced around as though he were my friend or brother; I bowed down heavily, as one who mourns for his mother.

And as I tell my kids...

you can only control yourself and your own actions. Therefore, I apologize to anyone I offended in my previous post ,please, forgive me. That doesn't mean that I don't feel that way and that everything is A-OK. It just means that I'm sorry it offended you, even if you needed to hear it. However, if this didn't pertain to you and I offended you I truly am sorry. Although, this might be a good time to do some soul searching. I know I have learned a lot about myself through this.

I have been and I am going to continue to pray about how I feel and for my family and friends.
I invite you to do the same. Sorry for my ranting and raving post. You know, every once in a while you have got to throw a curve ball it keeps 'em guessing.

I'm Tired

....of the lies and deceit that surround me. Everytime I turn around it seems that I am seeing another friend or relative pretending to be someone they are not. Sometimes they finally come out and admit it or they aren't as sneaky as they think or they are just fooling themselves. Whatever the reason, I'm supposed to act like I'm A-OK with everything and that the lying and deceit are perfectly accceptable behavior. They never apologize to me or my family for their actions. They just offer mounds and mounds of excuses and rationalizations that justify their behavior, if we even get that. Needless to say, I know I need to forgive them and I will in time. I know that I'm not a perfect human by any stretch of the imagination. I know that God has forgiven me for my junk and he will forgive them as well(if they ask for forgiveness, meaning they admit they have done wrong). Although, I really don't think that these individuals feel that what they have done or are doing now is wrong. Which means that while they continue to live their wonderfully perfect lives and lies. I'm stuck dealing with their lies and lives and trying to do this in a Godly manner. This is something I'm really struggling with. Partly because these lies and deceit are hurting people I care deeply about even if these same people are doing similar things to other people whom I care deeply about. Talk about a general lack of RESPECT. Since these people are such perfect Godly people you would think that they wouldn't be so quick to judge my parenting style, marriage, or children. Not all of us can attain such high of standards. Sometimes what works for one family, marriage, or relationship doesn't always work for another.

Lost in Translation, #2

I thought I had better post these little tidbits before I forget and they are forever forgotten in oblivion. Konrad has done it once again. Although this time I wondered if maybe he was onto something. I think there is a chance that he is a genuis.

It all started on the way home from the Vitamen Cottage. When he said, "He liked being able to push the cart at Vitamen College(Cottage)." After this comment I just swelled up with pride for my son. What a smart kid, I think as long as he has this attitude, his life can only be fulfilling. Oh, I have so much to teach him.

Then the other night at the dinner table the kids started singing songs from the Sound of Music. I don't know the exact title of the song(but I can spell Echinacea without looking it up and I know the uses for Kava Kava and Valerian Root). I think the song title might be So Long, Farewell. Anyway, it is the song the kids sing during the party for the governess right before they go to bed when they take turns exiting and they also sing it to set up their escape. Whatever the song is called Konrad was singing it like this,

"So long, farewell your waiter says goodnight."

This is where I think he might be onto something. I mean, just think, when you eat at a restaurant, at the end of your meal, instead of the waiter just coming over and handing you the check. They could deliver it with style and maybe a little dance would get them a bigger tip as well. They could sing this when they give you the check.

"So long, farewell your waiter says goodnight, I hate to see you leave, your total came to $34.95."

It's just an idea, but it would definetly be easier on the ears as opposed to that stupid birthday chant done military style at Texas Roadhouse. Although, if they sing like me it might be better if they just handed you the check. That way they don't risk losing their entire tip.

When is Christmas Break Over?

I know there are some of you teachers out there enjoying your Christmas break. I'm happy that you are getting some of your relaxing, rest, and reading in. However, you will be paying for it when those children return to school. If the rest of the children out there are like mine. You are in trouble (insert evil laugh here!!!). We have been doing more crafty activities and we even went hiking on the Monument. Still they have an abundance of energy. They are feeding off of each other. Konrad in particular is losing his mind. He just runs from the front door to the back door making weird boy noises and jumping periodically while carrying a stick, bat, or other strange stuff. After about a 1/2 hour of this I tell him "Go and find something else to do." He then interprets this as "Go and bug your sister." So... about 5-10 minutes later I start to hear high pitched wails and screaming. Upon investigating why I'm hearing what I'm hearing, I find out that Kirsten thinks she is hurt(She has no middle ground. She is either fine or near death.) from being tackled while playing football in the living room, or Konrad has taken the item she was playing with. Konrad then proceeds to act like she asked him to take this item and that he can't hear her screaming about it. Now in his defense, sometimes when she is screaming and wailing only dogs can hear her complaints. However, when we are able to hear her complaints so can anyone within a 100 yard radius. So, at this point I send them to their rooms because after going through this a few times I have realized that I am then guaranteed a few moments of peace and quiet. Atleast, until the cycle starts again.

I seriously thought about moving to a different county for one week because their school started on Monday. I'm starting to regret my decision.